Self Love Starts Within

Self Love | Self Discovery | Bare Skin Boudoir

Sitka Alaska | Tahoe California | Destination Boudoir

Isn’t it awful to lose 25 pounds or more, but discover that you still see yourself in the same way? It’s something nobody ever expects. We expect to feel as amazing as we look at the end of our goal. We think that once we look away we want, then we’ll feel the way we want. But nothing could be further from the truth.


Regardless of what you see on Instagram, the truth is that when most people lose weight, whether it’s from a lifetime of plumpness or a few years of letting go, they never quite shake that feeling of being Less Than. Less than attractive, less than desirable, less than cool, less than perfect.


You Are Capable

Of Amazing Things

That’s because feeling Less Than was never really about the weight. You fixed your perceived flaws on a surface “problem,” attaching all your fears of not measuring up to your physical appearance--easily explained and just as easily fixed, if only you could drop those pounds. Then everything would be OK.

What an absolute gut punch when we find that no longer being overweight doesn’t make those feelings go away.

Like most of life‘s greatest hurdles, we have to put in the hard, messy, complicated work in order to overcome the problem. When lost in any forest, the only way forward is through. Fixing a single, scapegoat issue with ourselves is not going to magically change everything else.

Own Who You Are

I’ve got news for you: skinny people feel inadequate and Less Than, too. Chances are, you may yourself have once been a skinny person, yet you still felt this way. Maybe those feelings even drove you to gain the extra weight in the first place!

While losing weight and getting healthy is an important change for anyone to make and can genuinely help you feel better, learning to love yourself can only come from within. You have to look at the inner parts of yourself that need change and care, too, and put just as much effort into your inner health as you do your outer health. Only then will you actually feel different, not just look different.


Be Real, Not Perfect

There’s a million different ways to do this, and each way is as unique as the person. Seeking the help of a therapist, or examining toxic relationships, or practicing basic self-care, or splurging on yourself once in a while as an act of love are all things that can increase your inner health, just to name a few.

And yes, it is good to start changing the way you see yourself, because you do look different now. You are different now. You just did something amazingly difficult, and you succeeded. And that is a very very beautiful thing.

Just like you.